Wednesday, May 11, 2016

Mother's Day

Sunday was Mother's Day. This is a joyous day for some, but difficult for others. All over social media, people start posting Mother's Day memes, photos of themselves with their mothers, their grandmothers, their kids...but what about those who have lost a mother, lost a child, or grieve the child they cannot have? It's easy to become bitter, calloused, and upset.

The most important thing is to know that it's okay to feel that way. It is understandable that given your situation, you might not want to celebrate Mother's Day. It is understandable that all the memes and posts and photos and words of others remind you of your loss, which may remind you of your pain.

What can you do? Well for starters, if you are reading this, and you never thought about how Mother's Day may be hard for some, then I invite you to just be conscious of this. That doesn't mean you shouldn't celebrate Mother's Day, but it may be that you are just more sensitive around those who may not enjoy Mother's Day. Perhaps you can adjust the privacy settings of your social media posts so as not to include those who may be hurt by your posts. 

If you're sad on Mother's Day and you know it's going to upset you when you scroll through your social media feed, make it a point to avoid social media on this day. Spend time with someone who may understand your pain or grief. Do something special for yourself. Most importantly, don't hold it against others. Know that those who unknowingly wish you a Happy Mother's Day, or those who are celebrating their mothers or motherhood, are not doing it maliciously, and are not doing it to hurt you. Unless they have gone through the pain of infertility or the pain of losing a mother or child, they are likely unaware of the sadness that a day like this can cause.

Love it or hate it, don't let Mother's Day define you. You are you, and you are worthy and valuable and loved.

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