The feeling after giving birth without an epidural was amazing. I was on a high and I couldn't believe I'd done it! It was a goal of mine that I wasn't sure I could accomplish, and I did it. I'm still super pumped about it.
We were able to do do immediate skin-to-skin, delayed cord clamping, etc. I remember delivering the placenta, and David cutting the cord. About an hour or so after the doctor left, I started feeling pain down there. The nurses thought it may be from the stitches, but I knew it was something beyond that. Finally, they took a look and discovered I'd developed a large (and painful) hematoma. Most likely it was caused by how fast the baby came, and the fact that I was on aspirin. They were able to get me on some pain medication, which helped, and then they had to put in a folley catheter since I couldn't urinate.
It was so nice being able to stay in the same room and have the baby with us. I was able to try breastfeeding and work with the lactation consultants from the comfort of the room. The only concerns we had this time with the baby was getting him to gain weight. His jaundice levels seemed ok. The more pressing concern was the pain from my hematoma and my inability to urinate. The doctor wanted to remove the catheter after 24 hours so as to prevent infection, but even after removing it, I was unable to urinate on my own. The nurse (and a student) set up a sitz bath for me, which felt good. Finally, the nurses had to straight cath me since I really had to pee. The relief didn't last long though, and I was afraid they'd have to cath me again, but finally, I was able to urinate a little (the pain meds helped), which was a big relief. Since the baby was born after midnight, we were able to stay an extra night, and we opted to leave that Thursday.
As far as the hematoma goes, the plan was to keep an eye on it and see if my body would absorb it, while also managing pain with medication. The OB wanted to follow up with me in a week.
We checked out around 2 in the afternoon, stopped to get diapers, and then headed back to the house where we were planning to meet the birth photographer so she could take pictures of the toddler (and my mom) meeting the new baby. It was absolutely the sweetest thing to see my daughter meet and love on her baby brother; it brought me to tears.
The past (nearly) four weeks have been a whirlwind full of appointments with the pediatrician, blood draws (and a few jaundice scares that turned out to be ok), appointments with lactation consultants, the chiropractor, a cranio sacral therapist, etc. At my one week follow up with the OB, she said part of my hematoma had gone down, but another part may have swelled more, so she wanted to see me in another week and then possibly surgically evacuate it. The following week, I went back in and we went ahead with the procedure. Unfortunately, that meant that the wound had to be packed (by someone else) twice a day, which was a painful and tedious process. Luckily, after a week, I went back, and she said the wound had healed/closed, and I no longer had to pack it. Right now, I am (mainly) off pain medication, which is a big step for me, though I'm still in pain.
He is such a good baby. He sleeps really well, and really only cries when he's hungry. I often have to wake him just to feed him every few hours. The toddler has been adjusting well. She loves her baby brother and constantly comments about how "cute" he is or says he's "sad" when he cries. It's a big of an adjustment with her getting used to my mom being here and helping to care for her, and also shuttling her to and from daycare. I'm honestly a little worried about how I'll handle things when my mom leaves and I need to care for both of them by myself while David's at work, but I think we will slowly get into a routine.
Right now, I'm just going to soak in the time left we have with my mom here, enjoy my naptime snuggles with the baby, and continue recovering.
I just love my little family.
Sunday, March 8, 2020
2nd Birth Story - Part 1
On Friday, February 7, 2020, at 9:40am, I went in for my 37 week appointment at my OB's office. I had had a couple borderline high blood pressure readings, but ok bloodwork, but that morning, my blood pressure was at 140/80 and I was 2 cm dilated and 50% effaced. She had me do an in-house urine culture and then go get my blood drawn. She wanted me to move my following week's appointment up earlier (since she'd be going out of town over the weekend) and if I had another high blood pressure, she'd induce.
At this point, I was ok with being induced, since we'd already made it past my first baby's birth date, and we were at a safe time to deliver...my only concern was who would watch my toddler, since my mom wasn't planning on coming until a couple weeks later. I talked to my parents and my mom was able to change her flight to come a week early, that Sunday, February 9, 2020. I went through the weekend feeling a little nervous about my blood pressure and urine protein level, and kept wondering if I should go to the hospital or just wait things out. Ultimately, I decided to wait until Monday morning, February 10, 2010...but before I could even call the OB office, I got a call from the nurse with blood test and urine results; I was trending toward preeclampsia so the doctor wanted me to go in at 1:30pm, and if I had a high blood pressure, I'd go to the hospital and be induced. The reading ended up being 148/100, one of my highest, and I was diagnosed with "gestational hypertension" and was sent to the hospital. David and I had planned for this, so we'd brought our bags and had my mom and the toddler all set and taken care of at home.
I was immediately admitted and we got settled into our room (2511). To my relief, I was reassured that since I was not in the preeclampsia stage yet (just gestational hypertension), that I would not need to be on magnesium this time. My amazing doula, Kristen, arrived shortly after I was admitted. The first induction gel was administered at 3:25pm (3 cm, 70% effaced, soft anterior). After waiting an hour for it to kick in, we went to walk around for an hour. We talked to Kristen and agreed for her to go home for a short time before coming back for the night. They administered the second gel at 5:50pm (same stats), and we repeated the process. I developed a headache at 6:36pm and started to feel the start/stop of contractions at 6:39pm (though they'd been going on for awhile). The third gel was administered at 8:26 pm (3 cm, 80% effaced, -2). At this point I was wondering if they were going to have to administer pitocin (which I didn't want for various reasons), but by 10:55pm, I was really starting to feel the contractions and I was 5 cm dilated.
At 11:11pm, I was between 8-9 cm and at this point, things were very intense and painful. I used my "code word" several times with Kristen and David (which meant I wanted pain relief), but thankfully, Kristen and the nurse (Kerissa) were able to talk me through things, and suggested I get into the tub. (This is when the birth photographer arrived too, just in time!) I immediately felt better in the warm water, though I was told I'd need to get out of the tub sooner than later since I was progressing so quickly. (When I got into the tub, I felt the need to push already.) By the time I got out at 11:23pm and they checked me again, I was 10 cm dilated!
At this point, the doctor had arrived, and it was show time. I couldn't believe I'd made it to this point without an epidural. I was lying on my side, clutching the side of the bed in the fetal position with my legs clamped shut. I didn't want to move, but finally I willed myself to lie on my back, which was a better position for delivering. It was time to push, and I could only manage to get myself to push for short counts of time. I kept thinking to myself, "why can't I push for longer? I feel like if I can just hold out for longer, he will come on that last count." I remember being super annoyed with the fetal monitor around my belly, and wanting it to be removed. The doctor tried to help me with pushing, telling me to hold my breath, push, and then breathe out. She told me to curl my body over the baby. Finally, things clicked. I realized I needed to continue holding my breath when pushing, rather than breathe out on the push. After the second time, to everyone (including the doctor's) surprise, he was here! After about 30 minutes of pushing, he was born at 12:08am, and he was absolutely perfect.
At this point, I was ok with being induced, since we'd already made it past my first baby's birth date, and we were at a safe time to deliver...my only concern was who would watch my toddler, since my mom wasn't planning on coming until a couple weeks later. I talked to my parents and my mom was able to change her flight to come a week early, that Sunday, February 9, 2020. I went through the weekend feeling a little nervous about my blood pressure and urine protein level, and kept wondering if I should go to the hospital or just wait things out. Ultimately, I decided to wait until Monday morning, February 10, 2010...but before I could even call the OB office, I got a call from the nurse with blood test and urine results; I was trending toward preeclampsia so the doctor wanted me to go in at 1:30pm, and if I had a high blood pressure, I'd go to the hospital and be induced. The reading ended up being 148/100, one of my highest, and I was diagnosed with "gestational hypertension" and was sent to the hospital. David and I had planned for this, so we'd brought our bags and had my mom and the toddler all set and taken care of at home.
I was immediately admitted and we got settled into our room (2511). To my relief, I was reassured that since I was not in the preeclampsia stage yet (just gestational hypertension), that I would not need to be on magnesium this time. My amazing doula, Kristen, arrived shortly after I was admitted. The first induction gel was administered at 3:25pm (3 cm, 70% effaced, soft anterior). After waiting an hour for it to kick in, we went to walk around for an hour. We talked to Kristen and agreed for her to go home for a short time before coming back for the night. They administered the second gel at 5:50pm (same stats), and we repeated the process. I developed a headache at 6:36pm and started to feel the start/stop of contractions at 6:39pm (though they'd been going on for awhile). The third gel was administered at 8:26 pm (3 cm, 80% effaced, -2). At this point I was wondering if they were going to have to administer pitocin (which I didn't want for various reasons), but by 10:55pm, I was really starting to feel the contractions and I was 5 cm dilated.
At 11:11pm, I was between 8-9 cm and at this point, things were very intense and painful. I used my "code word" several times with Kristen and David (which meant I wanted pain relief), but thankfully, Kristen and the nurse (Kerissa) were able to talk me through things, and suggested I get into the tub. (This is when the birth photographer arrived too, just in time!) I immediately felt better in the warm water, though I was told I'd need to get out of the tub sooner than later since I was progressing so quickly. (When I got into the tub, I felt the need to push already.) By the time I got out at 11:23pm and they checked me again, I was 10 cm dilated!
At this point, the doctor had arrived, and it was show time. I couldn't believe I'd made it to this point without an epidural. I was lying on my side, clutching the side of the bed in the fetal position with my legs clamped shut. I didn't want to move, but finally I willed myself to lie on my back, which was a better position for delivering. It was time to push, and I could only manage to get myself to push for short counts of time. I kept thinking to myself, "why can't I push for longer? I feel like if I can just hold out for longer, he will come on that last count." I remember being super annoyed with the fetal monitor around my belly, and wanting it to be removed. The doctor tried to help me with pushing, telling me to hold my breath, push, and then breathe out. She told me to curl my body over the baby. Finally, things clicked. I realized I needed to continue holding my breath when pushing, rather than breathe out on the push. After the second time, to everyone (including the doctor's) surprise, he was here! After about 30 minutes of pushing, he was born at 12:08am, and he was absolutely perfect.
Saturday, October 13, 2018
Pre- and Post-Egg Retrieval - What Worked for Us
I've been thinking about writing about the lifestyle/diet changes we made pre- and post-egg retrieval as well as pre- and post-transfer. There are some things I wish I had known about before we got started (like cutting out alcohol and caffeine several months beforehand), so I thought it might be helpful to share these with anybody who is getting ready for an egg retrieval!
Now that I have 2 egg retrievals under my belt, I thought I'd share what worked for us. I will preface this by saying that I am not a doctor, and that not everything I am sharing was specifically recommended by my doctor. A lot of what I ended up doing came recommended by other people going through IVF, research studies/articles, other fertility clinics, etc. I will try to link to resources where I can. Please don't feel like you have to do any of these things, or that you messed things up by not doing these things. My thought process is this: Since we are investing so much into this--financially, emotionally, physically--I want to do whatever I can (reasonably) do to improve things, whether that is egg/sperm quality, number of eggs retrieved, quality of embryos, implantation rate, etc. I figure, even if there isn't scientific proof behind things, if it's not going to hurt, why not give it a shot so that I don't regret things later? I'd rather know I tried my best than live with the "what if?" later on.
Scroll down to the bottom for Conclusions, or a recap of what I discuss in this post.
Exercise: 3 Months and Prior
This is absolutely something you should talk to your doctor about. They will let you know if you're at a healthy BMI, and what you can do to help achieve one. Doctors generally recommend achieving a normal BMI, as "obesity has been found to alter mitochondrial function and increase oxidative stress, leading to reduced fertility and egg quality. It can also alter hormonal balance, disrupting ovulation." If you have some time before starting Stims--maybe you're saving up money, or waiting for a good time--this is a great time to start exercising and improving your overall health.
Exercise: During/After Stims
You should definitely consult your doctor about exercise during/after Stims, and during/after the 2WW. My nurse said I could continue my normal cardio/strength training during the early stages of injections (days 1-5), but by day 6, I would want to decrease intensity and focus on non-impact exercises (yoga, light elliptical, swimming, etc.). The main concern with strenuous exercise during Stims is that the medications will cause your ovaries to enlarge as the follicles start growing. According to the Southern California Reproductive Center, "You need to protect your ovaries during this sensitive time and avoid strenuous training. Your IVF cycle is not a time to push any limitations...Your body is already working extremely hard during your IVF cycle, so take the time to acknowledge yourself for that." One thing to think about after egg retrieval is the risks of ovarian torsion or ovarian hyperstimulation syndrome (OHSS), so following your doctor's orders and avoiding strenuous exercise are very important here.
Diet: 3 Months and Prior
Alcohol/Caffeine
I read an article that said that "given that egg and sperm maturation takes up to 3 months, it is ideal to stop/reduce alcohol consumption for at least three months before attempting pregnancy." I didn't know this prior to my first egg retrieval, so I had a minor freak out and wrote all about it here. I came to the conclusion that it wouldn't hurt to reduce/eliminate alcohol/caffeine in the 3 months prior to IVF (for both you and your partner), but that ultimately, it is not going to drastically compromise your chances. Knowing this information, we eliminated caffeine/alcohol from our diets 3 months before our 2nd egg retrieval, and I think it did make some improvements for us!
Vitamins/Supplements
My nurse did encourage me to take a prenatal vitamin before we started Stims. Memphis fertility specialist, Dr. Amelia Bailey, recommends that "a woman planning pregnancy should start taking a prenatal vitamin with DHA 6 months before conceiving." She (and other other specialists) also recommend Coenzyme Q10 (CoQ10), DHEA, DHA, folic acid (as needed), and Vitamin D (as needed). CoQ10 is helpful for overall sperm and egg health. Vitamin D insufficiency and deficiency in women attempting to get pregnant has also become an increasing concern. (This article is really helpful if you're thinking of taking any of these mentioned vitamins/supplements.) I personally just took a prenatal vitamin, fish oil, and Vitamin D supplements before and during Stims.
According to Dalene Barton-Schuster, Certified Herbalist and Birth Doula, "The life cycle of sperm, from production to maturation for ejaculation, ranges from 42 to 76 days...to make a plan for increasing fertility and boosting sperm health, you should start at least 2-3 months prior to giving sperm for IVF." CoQ10 is said to improve men's sperm motility and count. There are also many articles claiming that selenium, Vitamin C, zinc, and other vitamins/supplements can help improve male reproductive health. Three months prior to our 2nd egg retrieval, David cut out caffeine/alcohol. He also took a multivitamin, 200mg of Ubiquinol (CoQ10), and the Daily Wellness Company's Fertility Blend for Men daily. The Fertility Blend for Men is something I stumbled upon a few weeks prior to our first egg retrieval. It has great reviews online, and contains many of the recommended supplements to boost male fertility, such as L-carnitine, Vitamins B/C/E, zinc, and selenium.
Here's a helpful article on pre-conception vitamins written by Sarah Yang for the Bump. Here is an article on nutritional guidelines for your fertility treatment published on the Southern California Reproductive Center's blog.
Diet: During/After Stims
My nurse told me that during Stims, "the recommendation for caffeine intake is less than 600 mg" per day and that restricting "all caffeine intake is preferred." She also said that "no alcohol intake is preferred/recommended." I checked and she said that it would be okay to drink caffeine-free Diet Coke and decaf coffee. I had eliminated diet sodas and artificial sugar from my diet once I became pregnant, so it was easy for me to continue avoiding it during my 2nd egg retrieval, though I've added in the occasional Diet Coke or Splenda now that I'm done breastfeeding. (We don't plan to do our next embryo transfer for awhile.)
I think that eating healthy is something that is great to do now for yourself and for your future baby! There are a lot of diet changes you need to make when you become pregnant, so it doesn't hurt to start getting used to those changes now.
Acupuncture
I had never given much thought to holistic medicine (except for chiropractic) prior to IVF, but my fertility clinic actually has an acupuncture facility right in their building, so it was something I looked into. Some studies have shown that "when used in conduction with Western fertility treatments, acupuncture increases conception rates by 26%." Others say that "acupuncture is not harmful and most of those so treated swear by it. For the nay-sayers, what can be said with certainty is that at the very least acupuncture has a 'feel good' aspect to it and in most, evokes a psychological benefit that should not be discounted." My thoughts are that it's not going to hurt anything, so why not give it a shot? I didn't do acupuncture prior to my first egg retrieval, but I did do it for about a month prior to my 2nd one, and I think it did make some improvements for us the second time around.
Conclusions
My main suggestions for Before Stims (preferably 3 months or prior):
Now that I have 2 egg retrievals under my belt, I thought I'd share what worked for us. I will preface this by saying that I am not a doctor, and that not everything I am sharing was specifically recommended by my doctor. A lot of what I ended up doing came recommended by other people going through IVF, research studies/articles, other fertility clinics, etc. I will try to link to resources where I can. Please don't feel like you have to do any of these things, or that you messed things up by not doing these things. My thought process is this: Since we are investing so much into this--financially, emotionally, physically--I want to do whatever I can (reasonably) do to improve things, whether that is egg/sperm quality, number of eggs retrieved, quality of embryos, implantation rate, etc. I figure, even if there isn't scientific proof behind things, if it's not going to hurt, why not give it a shot so that I don't regret things later? I'd rather know I tried my best than live with the "what if?" later on.
Scroll down to the bottom for Conclusions, or a recap of what I discuss in this post.
Exercise: 3 Months and Prior
This is absolutely something you should talk to your doctor about. They will let you know if you're at a healthy BMI, and what you can do to help achieve one. Doctors generally recommend achieving a normal BMI, as "obesity has been found to alter mitochondrial function and increase oxidative stress, leading to reduced fertility and egg quality. It can also alter hormonal balance, disrupting ovulation." If you have some time before starting Stims--maybe you're saving up money, or waiting for a good time--this is a great time to start exercising and improving your overall health.
Exercise: During/After Stims
You should definitely consult your doctor about exercise during/after Stims, and during/after the 2WW. My nurse said I could continue my normal cardio/strength training during the early stages of injections (days 1-5), but by day 6, I would want to decrease intensity and focus on non-impact exercises (yoga, light elliptical, swimming, etc.). The main concern with strenuous exercise during Stims is that the medications will cause your ovaries to enlarge as the follicles start growing. According to the Southern California Reproductive Center, "You need to protect your ovaries during this sensitive time and avoid strenuous training. Your IVF cycle is not a time to push any limitations...Your body is already working extremely hard during your IVF cycle, so take the time to acknowledge yourself for that." One thing to think about after egg retrieval is the risks of ovarian torsion or ovarian hyperstimulation syndrome (OHSS), so following your doctor's orders and avoiding strenuous exercise are very important here.
Diet: 3 Months and Prior
Alcohol/Caffeine
I read an article that said that "given that egg and sperm maturation takes up to 3 months, it is ideal to stop/reduce alcohol consumption for at least three months before attempting pregnancy." I didn't know this prior to my first egg retrieval, so I had a minor freak out and wrote all about it here. I came to the conclusion that it wouldn't hurt to reduce/eliminate alcohol/caffeine in the 3 months prior to IVF (for both you and your partner), but that ultimately, it is not going to drastically compromise your chances. Knowing this information, we eliminated caffeine/alcohol from our diets 3 months before our 2nd egg retrieval, and I think it did make some improvements for us!
Vitamins/Supplements
My nurse did encourage me to take a prenatal vitamin before we started Stims. Memphis fertility specialist, Dr. Amelia Bailey, recommends that "a woman planning pregnancy should start taking a prenatal vitamin with DHA 6 months before conceiving." She (and other other specialists) also recommend Coenzyme Q10 (CoQ10), DHEA, DHA, folic acid (as needed), and Vitamin D (as needed). CoQ10 is helpful for overall sperm and egg health. Vitamin D insufficiency and deficiency in women attempting to get pregnant has also become an increasing concern. (This article is really helpful if you're thinking of taking any of these mentioned vitamins/supplements.) I personally just took a prenatal vitamin, fish oil, and Vitamin D supplements before and during Stims.
According to Dalene Barton-Schuster, Certified Herbalist and Birth Doula, "The life cycle of sperm, from production to maturation for ejaculation, ranges from 42 to 76 days...to make a plan for increasing fertility and boosting sperm health, you should start at least 2-3 months prior to giving sperm for IVF." CoQ10 is said to improve men's sperm motility and count. There are also many articles claiming that selenium, Vitamin C, zinc, and other vitamins/supplements can help improve male reproductive health. Three months prior to our 2nd egg retrieval, David cut out caffeine/alcohol. He also took a multivitamin, 200mg of Ubiquinol (CoQ10), and the Daily Wellness Company's Fertility Blend for Men daily. The Fertility Blend for Men is something I stumbled upon a few weeks prior to our first egg retrieval. It has great reviews online, and contains many of the recommended supplements to boost male fertility, such as L-carnitine, Vitamins B/C/E, zinc, and selenium.
Here's a helpful article on pre-conception vitamins written by Sarah Yang for the Bump. Here is an article on nutritional guidelines for your fertility treatment published on the Southern California Reproductive Center's blog.
Diet: During/After Stims
My nurse told me that during Stims, "the recommendation for caffeine intake is less than 600 mg" per day and that restricting "all caffeine intake is preferred." She also said that "no alcohol intake is preferred/recommended." I checked and she said that it would be okay to drink caffeine-free Diet Coke and decaf coffee. I had eliminated diet sodas and artificial sugar from my diet once I became pregnant, so it was easy for me to continue avoiding it during my 2nd egg retrieval, though I've added in the occasional Diet Coke or Splenda now that I'm done breastfeeding. (We don't plan to do our next embryo transfer for awhile.)
I think that eating healthy is something that is great to do now for yourself and for your future baby! There are a lot of diet changes you need to make when you become pregnant, so it doesn't hurt to start getting used to those changes now.
Acupuncture
I had never given much thought to holistic medicine (except for chiropractic) prior to IVF, but my fertility clinic actually has an acupuncture facility right in their building, so it was something I looked into. Some studies have shown that "when used in conduction with Western fertility treatments, acupuncture increases conception rates by 26%." Others say that "acupuncture is not harmful and most of those so treated swear by it. For the nay-sayers, what can be said with certainty is that at the very least acupuncture has a 'feel good' aspect to it and in most, evokes a psychological benefit that should not be discounted." My thoughts are that it's not going to hurt anything, so why not give it a shot? I didn't do acupuncture prior to my first egg retrieval, but I did do it for about a month prior to my 2nd one, and I think it did make some improvements for us the second time around.
Conclusions
My main suggestions for Before Stims (preferably 3 months or prior):
- Exercise and get to a healthy BMI
- Eat healthy--limit/eliminate caffeine/alcohol, fake sugars, trans fats, processed foods, etc.
- Take prenatal/multivitamins, CoQ10, and other recommended vitamins/supplements
- Acupuncture (talk to your acupuncturist, but you can start 3 months prior, or even 3-4 weeks prior to Stims)
My main suggestions for During/After Stims:
- Limited non-strenuous exercise (as discussed with your doctor!)
- Continue to eat healthy--eliminate caffeine/alcohol, fake sugars, trans fats, processed foods, etc.
- Continue taking prenatal/multivitamins, and other recommended vitamins/supplements as needed (and recommended by your doctor)
- Acupuncture (talk to your acupuncturist about what they recommend for during Stims and leading up to the embryo transfer...)
Tuesday, August 15, 2017
Our Birth Story - Part 2
Everything that happened immediately after the birth is a bit of a blur. One of the side effects of magnesium is extreme drowsiness. I remember holding baby skin to skin, David cutting the cord, breastfeeding, and then at one point, both myself and the baby getting extremely cold. I remember them taking her away from me when this happened.
A few hours later, the nurses came in and said they wanted to try to help me move down to the postpartum floor, but I was so sick that I was unable to get out of bed. Every time I sat up or tried to get out of bed, I would get so lightheaded and almost pass out. At one point I just started throwing up, so they let me stay in bed a little longer until I was feeling a little better. Eventually, they got me down to the postpartum room, which I must say, was a lot less glamorous than the labor and delivery room. The second nurse I had wanted to put me back on high blood pressure medicine, which I remembered my labor & delivery nurse taking me off of. When I questioned her about it, she mentioned another doctor's name (not my doctor) so I immediately got concerned. I called the Labor & Delivery department and they spoke to my doctor who spoke to the nurse and got things straightened out. I was worried we got off on the wrong foot, but that nurse turned out to be the nicest one.
The next few hours were torture because I was unable to get out of bed to go see the baby, and they were unable to bring her to me. They were concerned about her weight/size and at the time, I was adamant about not wanting them to introduce a pacifier, nipple, or formula. I wanted to exclusively breastfeed, which is pretty difficult to do when you can't physically be with your baby. They kept me on the magnesium for 24 hours after the delivery, so for the next 24 hours, I laid in bed with a catheter (which they inserted while I was awake), trying to keep food down. A nurse and then an assistant came every hour to check my vitals, blood pressure, uterus, etc. Someone from phlebotomy also regularly came to take my blood. In the wee hours of the morning, a girl from phlebotomy came and missed my vein twice and I just lost it and broke down in tears. I was worried about feeding the baby, and I was only making tiny amounts of colostrum, which David painstakingly helped collect into a small syringe which he would then take down to the NICU. Both her nurse and doctor came up to see me in my room to assure me she was doing ok and they were taking good care of her, which meant so much to me.
A few hours after they took me off the magnesium, I was finally well enough to be wheeled down to the NICU to see the baby. Oh my gosh, I fell in love! It was difficult to see her hooked up to so many tubes and monitors. She was hooked up to a Bili Blanket due to jaundice, and they had the cutest little eye mask on her. When David and first seen her like that, he returned to my room and told me she was getting the "blue light special." The nurses even drew some eyelashes on her eye mask, and so I always joked that she was tanning in a tanning bed.
After her weight fell to 3 lb. 11 oz., they decided to put in a nasogastric (NG) tube to help feed her and were also giving her IV nutrition. I tried to breastfeed, and she seemed to be latching, although she kept falling asleep at the breast. One night when David and I were collecting my colostrum, we noticed that it kept flowing! He suggested I try pumping again (when previously I had not pumped out anything), so I gave it a shot, and to my surprise, collected a decent amount of milk! From that moment on, I was able to pump more and more. I was discharged from the hospital on Monday, 6.26.17. Thankfully, the NICU had a family room available for David and I to stay in, which was right off the nursery, so we moved right in. Luckily, the dogs were still boarding at the vet's kennel.
After making some progress and gaining weight, they decided to try a day without the NG tube and strictly breastfeeding. This was the most exhausting day. The nurses called me almost every hour (sometimes two) to come feed her when she awoke. Unfortunately, the next day, she had lost all the weight she'd gained which meant she was not transferring milk. The nurses and lactation consultants kept assuring me that she would get better at breastfeeding as she got older/bigger, and not to get discouraged, but I was so upset and felt like I had been starving my baby. The doctors made me feel much better though, so we talked about a few alternatives such as bottle feeding, formula, and a _____. One evening, the nurse helped me take a pre-feed and post-feed weight to see if the baby was transferring milk. Unfortunately, the scale was inaccurate and she actually weighed less the second time. Next, we decided to try the ____. The lactation consultant tried a pre- and post-feed weight again, but she remained the same. I finally relented to giving her a bottle. The nurse and doctor helped me come up with a compromise: I would breastfeed her for ten minutes, and then give her a bottle of breastmilk. David and the nurses had talked to me and made me realize that yes, it would have been nice to strictly breastfeed as planned...but things didn't go as planned. She came 5 weeks early, and with that, some of my plans had to change. I realized that this didn't mean I couldn't still breastfeed her later. The goal was to get her to a healthy weight, so that she could go home and we could learn to breastfeed as she got older/bigger. The next few days, she started gaining weight and doing a lot better. The nurses removed her IV (which kept coming out), and she was even taken off the Bili Blanket (though she was later put back on). After nine days, the doctor felt she was ready to go home! It was perfect timing. The last night she was there, my mom had flown in, and it was the first night that the family room was unavailable. We were able to take my mom home and I got a good night's rest in my own bed. The next day, the nurses told me the baby had passed all her tests (hearing, car seat etc.) and we were finally able to take her home in a car bed (since she was still too small for her carseat).
The past 6.5 weeks have been exhausting, but amazing. My mom was able to stay with us for a little over 4 weeks (7.1.17-8.2.17), and she was a lifesaver. She cooked for us everyday, took care of the baby so we could rest, watched the baby so we could go out on a couple dates, and helped me re-organize the house (including multiple closets and cabinets). I was a mess when she finally had to go home. I didn't realize how exhausting caring for a newborn can be. The baby has not been wanting to sleep in her crib or pack and play and instead prefers to sleep in our arms or the rock and play, which is not ideal for long-term sleep. We finally got this co-sleeper bassinet which has helped a little. She still grunts and groans a lot during her sleep, but the good thing about it is that if she cries, we can reach over and soothe her with a pacifier, or pick her up to feed her without getting out of bed.
Last week, David's parents and our sister-in-law came to meet the baby. Our sister-in-law is a photographer back in NC where we used to live, and I was so excited to fly her out here to take photos of the baby and the nursery. David took his family to Sedona and to the Grand Canyon, and we got to spend a few nights together eating dinner and just catching up. This is my first full week home alone with the baby. Yesterday, I took her out to run some errands including stopping to get my tires fixed, and going to the grocery store and Target. Everything with a baby takes extra time, and I feel like I'm always late to every appointment. I'm a slave to the breast pump, and I'm running on only a couple hours of sleep, but I could not be more in love with this tiny human being. She is amazing. :)
A few hours later, the nurses came in and said they wanted to try to help me move down to the postpartum floor, but I was so sick that I was unable to get out of bed. Every time I sat up or tried to get out of bed, I would get so lightheaded and almost pass out. At one point I just started throwing up, so they let me stay in bed a little longer until I was feeling a little better. Eventually, they got me down to the postpartum room, which I must say, was a lot less glamorous than the labor and delivery room. The second nurse I had wanted to put me back on high blood pressure medicine, which I remembered my labor & delivery nurse taking me off of. When I questioned her about it, she mentioned another doctor's name (not my doctor) so I immediately got concerned. I called the Labor & Delivery department and they spoke to my doctor who spoke to the nurse and got things straightened out. I was worried we got off on the wrong foot, but that nurse turned out to be the nicest one.
The next few hours were torture because I was unable to get out of bed to go see the baby, and they were unable to bring her to me. They were concerned about her weight/size and at the time, I was adamant about not wanting them to introduce a pacifier, nipple, or formula. I wanted to exclusively breastfeed, which is pretty difficult to do when you can't physically be with your baby. They kept me on the magnesium for 24 hours after the delivery, so for the next 24 hours, I laid in bed with a catheter (which they inserted while I was awake), trying to keep food down. A nurse and then an assistant came every hour to check my vitals, blood pressure, uterus, etc. Someone from phlebotomy also regularly came to take my blood. In the wee hours of the morning, a girl from phlebotomy came and missed my vein twice and I just lost it and broke down in tears. I was worried about feeding the baby, and I was only making tiny amounts of colostrum, which David painstakingly helped collect into a small syringe which he would then take down to the NICU. Both her nurse and doctor came up to see me in my room to assure me she was doing ok and they were taking good care of her, which meant so much to me.
A few hours after they took me off the magnesium, I was finally well enough to be wheeled down to the NICU to see the baby. Oh my gosh, I fell in love! It was difficult to see her hooked up to so many tubes and monitors. She was hooked up to a Bili Blanket due to jaundice, and they had the cutest little eye mask on her. When David and first seen her like that, he returned to my room and told me she was getting the "blue light special." The nurses even drew some eyelashes on her eye mask, and so I always joked that she was tanning in a tanning bed.
After her weight fell to 3 lb. 11 oz., they decided to put in a nasogastric (NG) tube to help feed her and were also giving her IV nutrition. I tried to breastfeed, and she seemed to be latching, although she kept falling asleep at the breast. One night when David and I were collecting my colostrum, we noticed that it kept flowing! He suggested I try pumping again (when previously I had not pumped out anything), so I gave it a shot, and to my surprise, collected a decent amount of milk! From that moment on, I was able to pump more and more. I was discharged from the hospital on Monday, 6.26.17. Thankfully, the NICU had a family room available for David and I to stay in, which was right off the nursery, so we moved right in. Luckily, the dogs were still boarding at the vet's kennel.
After making some progress and gaining weight, they decided to try a day without the NG tube and strictly breastfeeding. This was the most exhausting day. The nurses called me almost every hour (sometimes two) to come feed her when she awoke. Unfortunately, the next day, she had lost all the weight she'd gained which meant she was not transferring milk. The nurses and lactation consultants kept assuring me that she would get better at breastfeeding as she got older/bigger, and not to get discouraged, but I was so upset and felt like I had been starving my baby. The doctors made me feel much better though, so we talked about a few alternatives such as bottle feeding, formula, and a _____. One evening, the nurse helped me take a pre-feed and post-feed weight to see if the baby was transferring milk. Unfortunately, the scale was inaccurate and she actually weighed less the second time. Next, we decided to try the ____. The lactation consultant tried a pre- and post-feed weight again, but she remained the same. I finally relented to giving her a bottle. The nurse and doctor helped me come up with a compromise: I would breastfeed her for ten minutes, and then give her a bottle of breastmilk. David and the nurses had talked to me and made me realize that yes, it would have been nice to strictly breastfeed as planned...but things didn't go as planned. She came 5 weeks early, and with that, some of my plans had to change. I realized that this didn't mean I couldn't still breastfeed her later. The goal was to get her to a healthy weight, so that she could go home and we could learn to breastfeed as she got older/bigger. The next few days, she started gaining weight and doing a lot better. The nurses removed her IV (which kept coming out), and she was even taken off the Bili Blanket (though she was later put back on). After nine days, the doctor felt she was ready to go home! It was perfect timing. The last night she was there, my mom had flown in, and it was the first night that the family room was unavailable. We were able to take my mom home and I got a good night's rest in my own bed. The next day, the nurses told me the baby had passed all her tests (hearing, car seat etc.) and we were finally able to take her home in a car bed (since she was still too small for her carseat).
The past 6.5 weeks have been exhausting, but amazing. My mom was able to stay with us for a little over 4 weeks (7.1.17-8.2.17), and she was a lifesaver. She cooked for us everyday, took care of the baby so we could rest, watched the baby so we could go out on a couple dates, and helped me re-organize the house (including multiple closets and cabinets). I was a mess when she finally had to go home. I didn't realize how exhausting caring for a newborn can be. The baby has not been wanting to sleep in her crib or pack and play and instead prefers to sleep in our arms or the rock and play, which is not ideal for long-term sleep. We finally got this co-sleeper bassinet which has helped a little. She still grunts and groans a lot during her sleep, but the good thing about it is that if she cries, we can reach over and soothe her with a pacifier, or pick her up to feed her without getting out of bed.
Last week, David's parents and our sister-in-law came to meet the baby. Our sister-in-law is a photographer back in NC where we used to live, and I was so excited to fly her out here to take photos of the baby and the nursery. David took his family to Sedona and to the Grand Canyon, and we got to spend a few nights together eating dinner and just catching up. This is my first full week home alone with the baby. Yesterday, I took her out to run some errands including stopping to get my tires fixed, and going to the grocery store and Target. Everything with a baby takes extra time, and I feel like I'm always late to every appointment. I'm a slave to the breast pump, and I'm running on only a couple hours of sleep, but I could not be more in love with this tiny human being. She is amazing. :)
Monday, August 14, 2017
Our Birth Story - Part 1
On June 23, 2017, at 10:10am, I went in for a routine NST at my OB's office. I had had a couple of high blood pressure readings and some higher-than-normal creatinine levels in my blood work, so the doctor had put me on bed rest and had me coming in twice weekly for NSTs. I also had low fluid, so I was drinking water like crazy (nearly a gallon per day) and it seemed to be working. At this appointment, my blood pressure measured extremely high and there was protein in my urine, so the doctor sent me to Labor & Delivery for blood work and monitoring.
As I drove across the street, the thought occurred to me that I could be induced that day and that baby would be here 5 weeks early...but at the same time, I thought that maybe my blood pressure would come down and they'd just send me home. I called David and told him what was going on. He, of course, wanted to come to the hospital to be with me, but I told him not to worry about it yet, because I still had the hope that I'd be sent home. While in triage, they monitored my blood pressure, which was not coming down, and ran some blood work. Finally, around 2:43pm, the results from the blood work came in, and the nurse informed me that the doctor wanted to admit and induce me! The doctor came to see me and informed me that I had reached the severe preeclampsia stage and that she would induce me that night. She would come back in the morning, as she didn't expect me to go into labor until then.
Looking back on it now, I was extremely calm given the circumstances. I told David not to come yet, because even with inducing, it could take 1-3 days before I'd go into active labor. Instead, I gave him a list of things to do at home including washing baby clothes, packing my hospital bag, and bringing the dogs to the kennel. I was moved into one of the labor and delivery rooms, and I got settled in. My good friend, Amy, came to visit and brought me a phone charger and some treats. I was so glad she was there, because they put me on IV Magnesium Sulfate which was awful. I immediately got really hot and uncomfortable. Then they started inducing me around 5:20pm using prostaglandin gel. Around this time, David arrived at the hospital, so I felt a lot better. At 5:27pm, the baby was at -2 and I was 1 cm dilated, 60% effaced. They applied a total of 3 gels every 2 hours (7:30pm, 9:30pm). At 7:49pm baby was -3, I was 1-1.5cm dilated 60-70% effaced. To be completely honest, much of that night is a blur to me, but I remember that I started feeling period-like cramping after a couple gels, and then full on contractions in the middle of the night. At around 1:00am, I felt dampness and asked a nurse to check if my water had broke, and it had--on its own! At 2:56am, baby was -2, and I was 3.5 cm dilated, 75% effaced. They gave me Pitocin at 3am.
While this was going on, David was sleeping. I didn't want to wake him up because I felt I had time and could power through some of the less painful contractions until full on labor started. At 6:03am, the contractions were approximately 4 minutes apart and becoming more and more painful. I had the urge to push/bear down whenever the contractions came, even though I knew I should avoid doing so, so as not to inflame the cervix. When the contractions would come, they would get progressively more and more painful and peak, and then diminish, just like a bell curve. At the peaks, I felt myself clutching the bed rail as hard as I could. (I now know that the baby was a lot lower than we thought, and I was progressing much quicker than we all thought, so the pressure I felt down there was really baby's head pressing on my cervix.) At this point, David was awake and texting my doula for me, because I could no longer do it myself. At 7:19am the nurse checked me again and said "She is definitely a 6." At this point, I was in so much pain and ready for the epidural. (Up to this point, I had been refusing it because I wanted to go as long as I could without it so as to avoid a c-section.) The on-call anesthesiologist was at home and needed to get to the hospital, and then administer the epidural, which would take 45 minutes to begin working! I was so happy to see him when he came in at 8:02am. (-2, 6 cm, 80%) I don't remember much, except that he was extremely tall and that not long after he administered the epidural, I felt so much better. I was finally able to take a nap. The plan was for the doula to come around 10:30-11:00am, when it would be closer to pushing time...but at 9:09am, the nurses told me I was fully dilated (10 cm) and would start pushing soon! At 9:40am the doctor came and I began pushing, and baby was born at 9:59am and 31 seconds!
As I drove across the street, the thought occurred to me that I could be induced that day and that baby would be here 5 weeks early...but at the same time, I thought that maybe my blood pressure would come down and they'd just send me home. I called David and told him what was going on. He, of course, wanted to come to the hospital to be with me, but I told him not to worry about it yet, because I still had the hope that I'd be sent home. While in triage, they monitored my blood pressure, which was not coming down, and ran some blood work. Finally, around 2:43pm, the results from the blood work came in, and the nurse informed me that the doctor wanted to admit and induce me! The doctor came to see me and informed me that I had reached the severe preeclampsia stage and that she would induce me that night. She would come back in the morning, as she didn't expect me to go into labor until then.
Looking back on it now, I was extremely calm given the circumstances. I told David not to come yet, because even with inducing, it could take 1-3 days before I'd go into active labor. Instead, I gave him a list of things to do at home including washing baby clothes, packing my hospital bag, and bringing the dogs to the kennel. I was moved into one of the labor and delivery rooms, and I got settled in. My good friend, Amy, came to visit and brought me a phone charger and some treats. I was so glad she was there, because they put me on IV Magnesium Sulfate which was awful. I immediately got really hot and uncomfortable. Then they started inducing me around 5:20pm using prostaglandin gel. Around this time, David arrived at the hospital, so I felt a lot better. At 5:27pm, the baby was at -2 and I was 1 cm dilated, 60% effaced. They applied a total of 3 gels every 2 hours (7:30pm, 9:30pm). At 7:49pm baby was -3, I was 1-1.5cm dilated 60-70% effaced. To be completely honest, much of that night is a blur to me, but I remember that I started feeling period-like cramping after a couple gels, and then full on contractions in the middle of the night. At around 1:00am, I felt dampness and asked a nurse to check if my water had broke, and it had--on its own! At 2:56am, baby was -2, and I was 3.5 cm dilated, 75% effaced. They gave me Pitocin at 3am.
While this was going on, David was sleeping. I didn't want to wake him up because I felt I had time and could power through some of the less painful contractions until full on labor started. At 6:03am, the contractions were approximately 4 minutes apart and becoming more and more painful. I had the urge to push/bear down whenever the contractions came, even though I knew I should avoid doing so, so as not to inflame the cervix. When the contractions would come, they would get progressively more and more painful and peak, and then diminish, just like a bell curve. At the peaks, I felt myself clutching the bed rail as hard as I could. (I now know that the baby was a lot lower than we thought, and I was progressing much quicker than we all thought, so the pressure I felt down there was really baby's head pressing on my cervix.) At this point, David was awake and texting my doula for me, because I could no longer do it myself. At 7:19am the nurse checked me again and said "She is definitely a 6." At this point, I was in so much pain and ready for the epidural. (Up to this point, I had been refusing it because I wanted to go as long as I could without it so as to avoid a c-section.) The on-call anesthesiologist was at home and needed to get to the hospital, and then administer the epidural, which would take 45 minutes to begin working! I was so happy to see him when he came in at 8:02am. (-2, 6 cm, 80%) I don't remember much, except that he was extremely tall and that not long after he administered the epidural, I felt so much better. I was finally able to take a nap. The plan was for the doula to come around 10:30-11:00am, when it would be closer to pushing time...but at 9:09am, the nurses told me I was fully dilated (10 cm) and would start pushing soon! At 9:40am the doctor came and I began pushing, and baby was born at 9:59am and 31 seconds!
Sunday, April 23, 2017
Sharing "The Story Behind of Baby Nelson"
I struggled so much with whether or not I wanted to publicly share our IVF journey (with friends, family and coworkers). David was always for it. He wanted people to know that this baby was nothing short of a miracle. I finally came around and realized he was right, and we decided to share our "IVF story" today on social media, as it's the start of National Infertility Awareness Week. I posted a Note to my FB account and so far have been overwhelmed with the support and positive responses. Here's what it says:
Dear Friends and Family,
By now you have probably heard the wonderful news that David and I are expecting our little Nelson Nugget at the end of July. What you may not know, however, is the incredible journey we embarked on to get to this place. When David and I decided we were ready to add to our family in September of 2015, we soon discovered that it would not be so easy. To make a long story short, we learned that the only way we could conceive would be through in vitro fertilization (IVF). After meeting with our doctor in December, we prayed long and hard over this decision and did much research before deciding we wanted to continue on this journey. So for the past year, whenever anyone has asked me when we're having kids, I've just smiled...even though deep down inside I would be crying.
As soon as I was finished teaching my spring 2016 semester, I flew to Maryland to start the IVF process. And let me tell you...it was not easy. I do not like needles, and IVF requires a lot of needles! I had my blood drawn every other day to the point that both my arms were black and blue. I had invasive ultrasounds done every other day. I learned to give myself subcutaneous injections--2 to 3 per day--and later my mom and David learned to give me nightly intramuscular injections. (In total, I have had ~108 injections.) All the while, we dealt with the emotional roller coaster that comes with IVF. There are so many hurdles you must get over before moving on to the next step, and if one fails, you have to start over. Our first transfer in July was unsuccessful; the embryo did not implant. I was devastated. I couldn't get out of bed. I didn't think I could go back to work in the fall. Yet somehow, by the grace of God, I picked myself up again. In November, I flew back to Maryland and transferred our last frozen embryo. This little miracle embryo implanted, and we are 26 weeks,1 day pregnant today.
The reason I am sharing this is because I do not want people to think that this was an easy, planned, journey for us...because it wasn't. At the same time, we were blessed to find out about our need for IVF from the very beginning, and I am very thankful for that. I know several people who have experienced (and are experiencing) the hardships of infertility...and have experienced this for too long. My heart truly goes out to them as I can only share in some of the pain they feel.
While I know most of you are happy for us, I know that some of you may also have some questions...and I am happy to try to answer them if you want to private message me. Please note that this is a very sensitive topic for us, so if for some reason, you are against our choice of doing IVF, please refrain from contacting me, as I do not wish to get into an argument or debate about one of the happiest moments in our lives. However, I will share that we did not have to worry about multiples, as our doctor practices elective single embryo transfer (eSET), so we only transferred 1 embryo at a time. And in our case, we are not worrying about extra, frozen embryos. We had 2 embryos and we transferred both of them. The first one did not implant, and the second one did.
David and I just wanted to be honest and transparent about our journey. We got the good news the day before Thanksgiving and we were elated...but even then, we were not "out of the woods." I still had multiple blood tests and ultrasounds before my doctor would release me into the care of my OB/GYN. At 5 weeks, 6 days gestation, we had a scare and I ended up in the ER. I was diagnosed with a subchorionic hematoma (SCH) and was put on bed rest. The SCH was a scary diagnosis because it is linked to an elevated risk of miscarriage or pre-term labor. (As of the 3/10/17 anatomy scan, the SCH is no longer showing up on he U/S.) Beyond the medical side of things, there are also the the financial burdens associated with this. Unfortunately, our insurance does not cover fertility treatments, so we are paying for everything out of pocket. Some have asked if they could donate to our IVF fund, and the answer is yes, we would be so very grateful. We have an IVF GoFundMe account set up here if you are interested.
Thank you for taking the time to listen to our story. We hope this doesn't change how any of you feel about us, but we wanted our story to be heard. This week (April 23-29) is actually National Infertility Awareness Week, which felt like the perfect time to share our story with you. Did you know that 1 in 8 couples struggle to build a family? "The CDC tells us that this is 15% of couples in America. Infertility does not discriminate based on race, religion, sexuality or economic status. You never know how badly you want something until you are told that it may not be possible." For more information, please visit https://infertilityawareness.org/about-niaw.
Love,
Dorothy & David
Post Note: We are overwhelmed with the positive responses we have received. To be honest, I never knew if I wanted to share this story with anyone. It’s something I’ve gone back and forth with for months. Part of me worried that we would be judged for the particular route we chose to expand our family, whether for moral, religious, or other reasons. Part of me just didn’t want the whole world to know after we’d kept this secret for so long. David is the one that encouraged me to share our story, and I’m glad he gave me that push. We’ve gotten to see Baby Nelson since she was just a small cluster of cells and it’s hard to believe that that tiny little miracle embryo is now kicking me as I write this. (She kicks even more when I eat pizza.) Thank you so much for your kind words and support. It truly means a lot. :)
Dear Friends and Family,
By now you have probably heard the wonderful news that David and I are expecting our little Nelson Nugget at the end of July. What you may not know, however, is the incredible journey we embarked on to get to this place. When David and I decided we were ready to add to our family in September of 2015, we soon discovered that it would not be so easy. To make a long story short, we learned that the only way we could conceive would be through in vitro fertilization (IVF). After meeting with our doctor in December, we prayed long and hard over this decision and did much research before deciding we wanted to continue on this journey. So for the past year, whenever anyone has asked me when we're having kids, I've just smiled...even though deep down inside I would be crying.
As soon as I was finished teaching my spring 2016 semester, I flew to Maryland to start the IVF process. And let me tell you...it was not easy. I do not like needles, and IVF requires a lot of needles! I had my blood drawn every other day to the point that both my arms were black and blue. I had invasive ultrasounds done every other day. I learned to give myself subcutaneous injections--2 to 3 per day--and later my mom and David learned to give me nightly intramuscular injections. (In total, I have had ~108 injections.) All the while, we dealt with the emotional roller coaster that comes with IVF. There are so many hurdles you must get over before moving on to the next step, and if one fails, you have to start over. Our first transfer in July was unsuccessful; the embryo did not implant. I was devastated. I couldn't get out of bed. I didn't think I could go back to work in the fall. Yet somehow, by the grace of God, I picked myself up again. In November, I flew back to Maryland and transferred our last frozen embryo. This little miracle embryo implanted, and we are 26 weeks,1 day pregnant today.
The reason I am sharing this is because I do not want people to think that this was an easy, planned, journey for us...because it wasn't. At the same time, we were blessed to find out about our need for IVF from the very beginning, and I am very thankful for that. I know several people who have experienced (and are experiencing) the hardships of infertility...and have experienced this for too long. My heart truly goes out to them as I can only share in some of the pain they feel.
While I know most of you are happy for us, I know that some of you may also have some questions...and I am happy to try to answer them if you want to private message me. Please note that this is a very sensitive topic for us, so if for some reason, you are against our choice of doing IVF, please refrain from contacting me, as I do not wish to get into an argument or debate about one of the happiest moments in our lives. However, I will share that we did not have to worry about multiples, as our doctor practices elective single embryo transfer (eSET), so we only transferred 1 embryo at a time. And in our case, we are not worrying about extra, frozen embryos. We had 2 embryos and we transferred both of them. The first one did not implant, and the second one did.
David and I just wanted to be honest and transparent about our journey. We got the good news the day before Thanksgiving and we were elated...but even then, we were not "out of the woods." I still had multiple blood tests and ultrasounds before my doctor would release me into the care of my OB/GYN. At 5 weeks, 6 days gestation, we had a scare and I ended up in the ER. I was diagnosed with a subchorionic hematoma (SCH) and was put on bed rest. The SCH was a scary diagnosis because it is linked to an elevated risk of miscarriage or pre-term labor. (As of the 3/10/17 anatomy scan, the SCH is no longer showing up on he U/S.) Beyond the medical side of things, there are also the the financial burdens associated with this. Unfortunately, our insurance does not cover fertility treatments, so we are paying for everything out of pocket. Some have asked if they could donate to our IVF fund, and the answer is yes, we would be so very grateful. We have an IVF GoFundMe account set up here if you are interested.
Thank you for taking the time to listen to our story. We hope this doesn't change how any of you feel about us, but we wanted our story to be heard. This week (April 23-29) is actually National Infertility Awareness Week, which felt like the perfect time to share our story with you. Did you know that 1 in 8 couples struggle to build a family? "The CDC tells us that this is 15% of couples in America. Infertility does not discriminate based on race, religion, sexuality or economic status. You never know how badly you want something until you are told that it may not be possible." For more information, please visit https://infertilityawareness.org/about-niaw.
Love,
Dorothy & David
Post Note: We are overwhelmed with the positive responses we have received. To be honest, I never knew if I wanted to share this story with anyone. It’s something I’ve gone back and forth with for months. Part of me worried that we would be judged for the particular route we chose to expand our family, whether for moral, religious, or other reasons. Part of me just didn’t want the whole world to know after we’d kept this secret for so long. David is the one that encouraged me to share our story, and I’m glad he gave me that push. We’ve gotten to see Baby Nelson since she was just a small cluster of cells and it’s hard to believe that that tiny little miracle embryo is now kicking me as I write this. (She kicks even more when I eat pizza.) Thank you so much for your kind words and support. It truly means a lot. :)
Thursday, April 20, 2017
Maternity Style
I have been wearing my normal clothes for the majority of my pregnancy, but with my waistband starting to feel a little snug, I've started embracing showing off "the bump," and have found a few great maternity wardrobe pieces that I wanted to share on the blog today. A few weekends ago, David and I had to make the long drive to Ikea to return some stuff, so we stopped at a Motherhood Maternity Outlet Store where I found so many amazing pieces.
We live in a small little town and the closest maternity clothing store is 2.5 hours away...so I've also found many of my favorite pieces online or at Target. My friend and coworker introduced me to Pink Blush, which I've quickly fallen in love with. What I love about them is that many of their pieces can be worn before, during, and after pregnancy-and their models show what it looks like either way. Below are 10 of my favorite maternity wardrobe pieces:
We live in a small little town and the closest maternity clothing store is 2.5 hours away...so I've also found many of my favorite pieces online or at Target. My friend and coworker introduced me to Pink Blush, which I've quickly fallen in love with. What I love about them is that many of their pieces can be worn before, during, and after pregnancy-and their models show what it looks like either way. Below are 10 of my favorite maternity wardrobe pieces:
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| Here are 10 of my absolute favorite pieces! |
- Ivory Floral Striped Colorblock Maternity Top from Pink Blush - I actually got the Fuschia top (#2) first, but loved it so much that I had to get the floral one as well. I love the raglan sleeve, and this top can definitely be worn pregnant or not. I love wearing it with black leggings or skinny jeans.
- Fuscia Striped Colorblock Maternity Top from Pink Blush - You can see what it looks like on a non-pregnant model vs. a pregnant model (#1). I don't usually wear bright colors (like hot pink) but something about the raglan sleeve makes it so fun.
- Keyhole Side Ruched Maternity Tee Striped from Motherhood Maternity - This top is so comfortable and flattering that I got it in black/white and black/blue. The back has a fun little keyhole, and the elbow-sleeve makes it perfect for spring or summer.
- Jessica Simpson Back Interest Maternity T-shirt from Motherhood Maternity - I haven't found a maternity T-shirt I've liked until I tried on this one. Jessica Simpson makes some really cute maternity clothes for Motherhood Maternity . This T-shirt has a really fun back detail and is super soft. I can't wait to wear it this summer. I got it in black and light blue.
- Heavy-Knit Shift Dress from Old Navy - This isn't actually a maternity dress, but it's one of my favorites and I have it in 3 different colors! The material is thick and forgiving, and I wore this dress so much during the first trimester. People never even realized I was pregnant! In the fall and winter, I wore it with tights and boots and in the spring I've worn it bare-legged with flats.
- Liz Lange Maternity Over the Belly Distressed Jeggings from Target - I had given up on maternity jeans until I discovered these. Everything I tried on was too big in the waist until I realized that even though my bump was still small, an "over-the-belly" style worked better for me than "under-the-belly" or "side-panel" options. The latter two are always too big/loose for me in the waist/belly area, but the "over-the-belly" option works because you can wear it folded over (when your bump is still small) or pulled up (when your bump is bigger and needs the support). I love the distressing detail on these jeans!
- Liz Lange Maternity Under the Belly Ponte Pant from Target - "Under-the-belly" can also work too. I found these ponte pants on clearance and couldn't pass them up. They feel like leggings, but are ponte pants, so they're much thicker and are suitable to wear for work.
- BeMaternity by Ingrid & Isabel Seamless Belly Black Legging from Target - I've been mainly wearing my normal favorite leggings, but the high waistband has gotten a little tight, so I searched for a pair of comparable maternity leggings and found these. These are great because you can also fold the waistband over or pull it up.
- Side Ruched Maternity Dress from Motherhood Maternity - When I was at Motherhood Maternity, the sales lady insisted I try on this dress even though I wasn't looking for dresses. I tried it on in two patterns and instantly fell in love. The ruching is great because it grows with your bump, but I anticipate being able to wear this when I'm not pregnant too. I wore this striped pattern with a denim jacket yesterday and our admin. asst. kept telling me how cute I was.
- Royal Damask Bottom Maternity Maxi Dress from Pink Blush - I love this dress! I got it just before we left for our Babymoon and luckily my seamstress was able to hem it for me before we left that weekend. This can be worn pregnant or not, and it's just so eye-catching! I get compliments every time I wear it.
Monday, March 27, 2017
It's a...
I've been meaning to share this story for weeks now, but I was waiting until after our anatomy scan, and then totally forgot to do it.
We actually could have found out the baby's sex on January 19, 2017, when we went in for a 2D U/S, but we had the technician put the information in a sealed enveloped, and then I had David hide it from me. Our plan was to open it up on a special occasion, like Valentine's Day, so we could celebrate the news. Well, Valentine's Day didn't end up going as planned this year. We were both extremely busy and the night just did not turn out the way we had hoped it would, so we didn't end up opening the envelope that night.
That weekend (Saturday, February 18, 2017), David planned a special date for us. We went out to dinner (originally planned to be at a local restaurant/wine bar, but then at the last minute, I got a weird craving for potato skins, so we ended up going to a wings place instead--haha!) The plan after dinner was to go to one of our favorite European cafes for dessert, where, unbeknownst to me, David had set up for the waiter to bring out a special cupcake for us that would reveal the sex once I cut into it. However, I ruined the plan again because I was feeling so anxious about the baby's sex, and wanted to find out at home in private...so we ended up picking up some delicious desserts (macarons and tiramisu), and bringing them home.
Even though I ruined his plans, David still managed to salvage the moment. He set up a smorgasbord of our desserts (including 2 cupcakes that he had specially baked by a friend at work) and some roses. Since the plan with the waiter didn't work out, David ended up having to peek at the envelope first, but then he gave me the "right" cupcake to cut into...and it was pink!
We are overjoyed to share that we are having a baby girl! The sex was confirmed at our March 10, 2017 anatomy scan, and now we can plan accordingly!
On another note, I finally "officially" felt the baby move for the first time on March 21, 2017. The past two visits to the OB, my doctor and nurse have asked if I've felt anything and I've always been hesitant to answer because I haven't been sure...but at 3am on March 21, I was lying in bed with my hand on my tummy, and I distinctly felt it. I tried to wake David up for him to feel it, but he was so groggy. He ended up feeling it for himself in the morning at 8:13am. Since then, I can feel (and distinguish) baby girl's movements throughout the day, and most actively, at night. I can't tell if she's kicking or punching, but I love feeling the little nudges, pokes, and prods!
We have also made the decision to hire a DONA-certified birth doula to assist with the labor. We met a wonderful (and highly recommended) woman, and I am looking forward to sharing more about that later on!
We actually could have found out the baby's sex on January 19, 2017, when we went in for a 2D U/S, but we had the technician put the information in a sealed enveloped, and then I had David hide it from me. Our plan was to open it up on a special occasion, like Valentine's Day, so we could celebrate the news. Well, Valentine's Day didn't end up going as planned this year. We were both extremely busy and the night just did not turn out the way we had hoped it would, so we didn't end up opening the envelope that night.
That weekend (Saturday, February 18, 2017), David planned a special date for us. We went out to dinner (originally planned to be at a local restaurant/wine bar, but then at the last minute, I got a weird craving for potato skins, so we ended up going to a wings place instead--haha!) The plan after dinner was to go to one of our favorite European cafes for dessert, where, unbeknownst to me, David had set up for the waiter to bring out a special cupcake for us that would reveal the sex once I cut into it. However, I ruined the plan again because I was feeling so anxious about the baby's sex, and wanted to find out at home in private...so we ended up picking up some delicious desserts (macarons and tiramisu), and bringing them home.
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| It's a girl! |
We are overjoyed to share that we are having a baby girl! The sex was confirmed at our March 10, 2017 anatomy scan, and now we can plan accordingly!
On another note, I finally "officially" felt the baby move for the first time on March 21, 2017. The past two visits to the OB, my doctor and nurse have asked if I've felt anything and I've always been hesitant to answer because I haven't been sure...but at 3am on March 21, I was lying in bed with my hand on my tummy, and I distinctly felt it. I tried to wake David up for him to feel it, but he was so groggy. He ended up feeling it for himself in the morning at 8:13am. Since then, I can feel (and distinguish) baby girl's movements throughout the day, and most actively, at night. I can't tell if she's kicking or punching, but I love feeling the little nudges, pokes, and prods!
We have also made the decision to hire a DONA-certified birth doula to assist with the labor. We met a wonderful (and highly recommended) woman, and I am looking forward to sharing more about that later on!
Sunday, March 26, 2017
22 Weeks, 1 Day
I am 22 weeks and 1 day today. So many things have happened in the past few weeks:
- David and I had an amazing time in SoCal. We stayed in the cutest little beach bungalow in San Clemente. We went to a live taping of The Big Bang Theory, and also made it on camera for The Late Late Show with James Corden. We had a chance to meet up with his sweet cousin, Katie, and her husband, Brad.
- My friends (coworkers) are so sweet to be planning me a Baby Shower in early May. While I am excited for this, it also meant I was asked to come up with a Baby Registry, which I have been dreading completing. I spent the past week or so asking friends/family for suggestions and then weighing all the different options available. Let me tell you, there are so many options for every little thing, and there are so many things that people tell you you need (or don't need)! I ended up making an Excel spreadsheet with categories and listed different things that were suggested to me (supplemented by a few helpful lists: Baby Registry Checklist, Must-Have Registry Check List, Ultimate Registry Check List). I am now able to cross off the things I've registered for or have purchased myself.
- Speaking of purchases...David and I spent the entire day yesterday shopping for baby gear. I had the most anxiety over the stroller/carseat combo, but after doing a lot of research (and listening to a lot of opinions), my friend suggested the best thing I could do was go test them out and take a look at them in person. First, we went to IKEA, where we purchased a crib, dresser, bookcases, and high chair. (We seriously spent 4 hours there). Then we went to Babies"R"Us to take a look at some other things, including strollers. I am so glad we went with the IKEA crib, because I found the ones at Babies"R"Us to be too bulky/heavy for my taste. (I have had several friends recommend their IKEA cribs to me.) We took a look at infant bath tubs, and then took a look at some of the strollers and carseats. David and I both really liked the Baby Jogger City Mini GT for its smooth ride, maneuverability, and small size when folded up, but the price tag is a little hefty for us. There is one other stroller/carrier combo I really want to see, the Graco Aire4 XT Travel System, but unfortunately, I can't find a store with a display to check it out in person. The Graco Aire4 XT Travel System includes an infant car seat, stroller, and base for the same price as the Baby Jogger City Mini GT alone. (If we added on the infant car seat, base, adapter, and other accessories, we'd be spending an additional $200-$300!) On a side note, a few friends recommended I get a copy of Baby Bargains, which was really helpful in affirming my registry items. The funny thing is I totally read the Bridal Bargains book when we were planning our wedding!
- Another source of anxiety has been planning the layout of the nursery. We are turning our guest bedroom/office into the nursery. This means David moved his office into his Man Cave, and I moved my office into the office nook off of our great room. This also means we had to sell our queen guest bed and try to come up with a different guest room solution. After debating many options (including a murphy bed and air mattress), we have decided to get a daybed with pull-out trundle. After speaking to several new moms, I found that they all appreciated having a bed to rest on in between feedings (or when baby is sick). The bed will also serve as a guest bed (such as when my mom comes) and then hopefully baby will move to the bed after outgrowing the crib!
Now that I know what I want/need, and now that we've purchased a few of the big ticket items, I am feeling a lot better about being "ready" for the baby. I still need to clean out and organize the room, but once that's done, I can't wait to start decorating!
Saturday, March 11, 2017
Halfway!
I am officially 20 weeks today! We had our anatomy scan yesterday and everything looks great! Baby Nelson is measuring 1 day ahead. We also officially know the baby's sex, but are waiting to share this news publicly.
I am feeling a lot better this trimester. I figured out that the cause of my daily headaches was due to the pillow I was sleeping on. I have always been a stomach sleeper, but after switching to my back and side, I was waking up with neck aches and developing headaches after work everyday. After going to the store and getting fitted for this pillow, my daily headaches have gone away. Nausea has also mostly (if not completely) gone away as well.
At 20 weeks, I have gained between 3-4 lb. This is not a lot compared to many women, and I even had a scare a few weeks ago (on 2.17.17 at 16 weeks, 6 days) when I had lost some weight. Luckily, my OB was able to fit me in that day (a week before my scheduled ROB). We listened to the heartbeat on the doppler, and the doctor was not at all concerned. She explained to me that the baby is essentially a parasite, and will take from my body what it needs before anything bad would happen. At my anatomy scan yesterday, the baby measured perfectly (even ahead by 1 day), and again, the OB was not at all concerned with my weight. (Baby weighed in at 11 oz., and was measuring 1 day early in the 29th-49th percentile.)
I get comments regularly (from coworkers, friends, family, the dry cleaner, doulas, even strangers) that I am "so small" and "not showing at all." At first, this bothered me because it made me feel like I was a bad mother or doing something wrong...but now I am embracing the fact that I am healthy, the baby is healthy and right on track, and I still fit into my favorite skinny jeans. I have some of the cutest maternity clothes hidden away in my closet, and I look forward to the day I can wear them...but until now, I am happy being able to wear my normal clothes. David and I can see my belly growing everyday even if others can't. :)
Tomorrow, we leave for So-Cal for a much-needed Spring Break/Babymoon. I can't wait!
I am feeling a lot better this trimester. I figured out that the cause of my daily headaches was due to the pillow I was sleeping on. I have always been a stomach sleeper, but after switching to my back and side, I was waking up with neck aches and developing headaches after work everyday. After going to the store and getting fitted for this pillow, my daily headaches have gone away. Nausea has also mostly (if not completely) gone away as well.
At 20 weeks, I have gained between 3-4 lb. This is not a lot compared to many women, and I even had a scare a few weeks ago (on 2.17.17 at 16 weeks, 6 days) when I had lost some weight. Luckily, my OB was able to fit me in that day (a week before my scheduled ROB). We listened to the heartbeat on the doppler, and the doctor was not at all concerned. She explained to me that the baby is essentially a parasite, and will take from my body what it needs before anything bad would happen. At my anatomy scan yesterday, the baby measured perfectly (even ahead by 1 day), and again, the OB was not at all concerned with my weight. (Baby weighed in at 11 oz., and was measuring 1 day early in the 29th-49th percentile.)
I get comments regularly (from coworkers, friends, family, the dry cleaner, doulas, even strangers) that I am "so small" and "not showing at all." At first, this bothered me because it made me feel like I was a bad mother or doing something wrong...but now I am embracing the fact that I am healthy, the baby is healthy and right on track, and I still fit into my favorite skinny jeans. I have some of the cutest maternity clothes hidden away in my closet, and I look forward to the day I can wear them...but until now, I am happy being able to wear my normal clothes. David and I can see my belly growing everyday even if others can't. :)
Tomorrow, we leave for So-Cal for a much-needed Spring Break/Babymoon. I can't wait!
Friday, March 3, 2017
Stress!
Have I mentioned that being pregnant is stressful? Not only are you uncomfortable and dealing with the normal pregnancy-related hormonal changes, but for me, specifically, I had the add-ons of the IVF hormones. I also made the decision (with my doctor) to completely wean myself off of anti-anxiety medication...so basically I am a pregnant, hormone-laced woman with untreated anxiety.
I am currently sitting on my couch in the living room while a contractor is in (what will be) the baby's room fixing the drywall and a leaky window. My dad is currently visiting (staying at a hotel). We had another guest visit (stayed with us) for 3 nights about a month ago. All I can say is that this is STRESSFUL. I have quickly learned that during this time, for the sake of my well-being, I should not host any guests at all.
We (and by "we," I mean David) finished taking down the picture rail, patching the walls, and re-painting the nursery. However, we then discovered a leaky window which led to some minor mold in the drywall surrounding it. (This was after we had all new carpet installed, which was a whole other stress-inducing experience involving packing and a house in disarray.) The good news is that the mold is not serious, and the contractor is confident that he can remove all of it, reseal the window, and fix all the drywall. I'm hoping the job is finished today!
I can't wait until everything in there is fixed and painted. Next, I will need to tackle all of my "stuff" and make room for the baby. Below is my working To Do List!
I am currently sitting on my couch in the living room while a contractor is in (what will be) the baby's room fixing the drywall and a leaky window. My dad is currently visiting (staying at a hotel). We had another guest visit (stayed with us) for 3 nights about a month ago. All I can say is that this is STRESSFUL. I have quickly learned that during this time, for the sake of my well-being, I should not host any guests at all.
We (and by "we," I mean David) finished taking down the picture rail, patching the walls, and re-painting the nursery. However, we then discovered a leaky window which led to some minor mold in the drywall surrounding it. (This was after we had all new carpet installed, which was a whole other stress-inducing experience involving packing and a house in disarray.) The good news is that the mold is not serious, and the contractor is confident that he can remove all of it, reseal the window, and fix all the drywall. I'm hoping the job is finished today!
I can't wait until everything in there is fixed and painted. Next, I will need to tackle all of my "stuff" and make room for the baby. Below is my working To Do List!
My Tentative To Do List:
New kitchen table/chairs/barstoolsTrade in car for SUVChange carpetsFigure out maternity leave- Decide on daycare/pre-school
Take down picture rail in baby roomRe-paint baby room- Clean out baby room
- Furnish baby room
- Sign up for birthing classes
- Make/fill a Baby Registry
- Get info about doulas
Our important anatomy scan is scheduled for next week. We are praying for the best news. After that, David and I are planning on taking a little Spring Break/Babymoon to So-Cal. This will be a much needed break!
Saturday, January 28, 2017
Nesting!
I've officially entered "nesting" mode. We have 6 months which may seem like a lot of time, but there are so many things that I want to get done before the arrival of the baby and we have a number of out-of-town guests scheduled to come in the next few months (which creates a whole new level of stress).
On 1/19/17, we went to our local 3D U/S place to do a gender determination scan. It was mostly to feel safe before making our official pregnancy announcement, but the tech was able to determine the gender (which we have safely tucked away in a sealed envelope to open later).
I've contacted (and/or visited) ~6 different daycare/pre-school options in town. I knew from watching my friends' experiences with this that I wanted to get a head start, and I'm glad I have. I've found a few options, but am still deciding what works best as far as location, convenience, price, hours, and wait lists. I also finally worked out my birth/bonding FMLA and fall teaching schedule. The plan right now is to take 8 weeks of leave, and teach the 2nd 8 weeks online, which will allow me to stay home with the baby for the entire semester! I'll be working a little from home, but essentially won't have to take the baby to daycare until mid-January (when s/he is nearly 6 months).
Yesterday I went in for my Return OB (ROB) appointment and got to hear the heartbeat on the doppler. Then we drove 2.5 hours to take a look at a new car. I actually hadn't thought about a new vehicle at all during this whole process until David brought it up. He wanted to get a larger, safer, vehicle, with a few other features we've learned we need living in the snowy mountains, like AWD, dual climate control, and roof rails. We originally considered trading in his hatchback for an SUV, but then after talking about it, realized I'd be the one driving the baby around the most, so it'd be better to trade in my sedan. We spent 5 hours at the dealer yesterday (and another 5 hours on on the road), but we walked away with an amazing deal on a Honda CR-V with a handful of extras thrown in. I don't think the car salesman had anticipated what it'd be like negotiating with a pregnant, hungry, former buyer. ;-) I had always told myself I wanted to get a new VW Beetle next, but things can change in a heartbeat!
I have basic plans drawn out for the baby room, including trying to accommodate potential guests, but there are a few things we need to do first including changing out the carpet and repainting the walls. So much to do!
My Tentative To Do List:
On 1/19/17, we went to our local 3D U/S place to do a gender determination scan. It was mostly to feel safe before making our official pregnancy announcement, but the tech was able to determine the gender (which we have safely tucked away in a sealed envelope to open later).
I've contacted (and/or visited) ~6 different daycare/pre-school options in town. I knew from watching my friends' experiences with this that I wanted to get a head start, and I'm glad I have. I've found a few options, but am still deciding what works best as far as location, convenience, price, hours, and wait lists. I also finally worked out my birth/bonding FMLA and fall teaching schedule. The plan right now is to take 8 weeks of leave, and teach the 2nd 8 weeks online, which will allow me to stay home with the baby for the entire semester! I'll be working a little from home, but essentially won't have to take the baby to daycare until mid-January (when s/he is nearly 6 months).
Yesterday I went in for my Return OB (ROB) appointment and got to hear the heartbeat on the doppler. Then we drove 2.5 hours to take a look at a new car. I actually hadn't thought about a new vehicle at all during this whole process until David brought it up. He wanted to get a larger, safer, vehicle, with a few other features we've learned we need living in the snowy mountains, like AWD, dual climate control, and roof rails. We originally considered trading in his hatchback for an SUV, but then after talking about it, realized I'd be the one driving the baby around the most, so it'd be better to trade in my sedan. We spent 5 hours at the dealer yesterday (and another 5 hours on on the road), but we walked away with an amazing deal on a Honda CR-V with a handful of extras thrown in. I don't think the car salesman had anticipated what it'd be like negotiating with a pregnant, hungry, former buyer. ;-) I had always told myself I wanted to get a new VW Beetle next, but things can change in a heartbeat!
I have basic plans drawn out for the baby room, including trying to accommodate potential guests, but there are a few things we need to do first including changing out the carpet and repainting the walls. So much to do!
My Tentative To Do List:
- New kitchen table/
chairs/barstools Trade in car for SUV- Change carpets
Figure out maternity leave- Decide on daycare/pre-school
- Take down picture rail in baby room
- Re-paint baby room
- Furnish baby room
Tuesday, December 20, 2016
Second Ultrasound
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U/S from 12/19/16: Heartbeat (178 bpm) seen,
small SCH superior to (above) fetus; measuring at 8 weeks, 2 days;
CRL: 17.8 mm, Yolk Sac: 3.7 mm; SCH: 2.2 x 0.7 x 1.9 CM
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It's amazing how much Baby Nelson has grown in just over a week. S/he is still relatively small (the size of a raspberry), but is still bigger than the last U/S (the size of a blueberry)!
The SCH is still there, and is actually a little larger than it was last time. I'm waiting to hear back from my doctor to see if he is at all concerned. If everything looks good, it's possible that he will officially release me into the care of my OB/GYN tomorrow!
Sunday, December 11, 2016
Update - Part 2
On the afternoon of 11/30/16, I was sitting in my colleague's office and I started getting sharp abdominal (period-like) cramps. I didn't think much of it, as I had had occasional cramping here and there. When I got home a couple hours later, I was devastated to see blood. I knew that spotting was ok, but this to me seemed to be way more than spotting. With shaking hands, I texted David: "I think I'm having a miscarriage." He thought I was just worrying, and told me not to worry, but all I could manage to get out was "No. You need to come home now." The on-call nurse at the fertility clinic was very kind and asked me how much blood I saw, what it looked like, and said that I should try to schedule an U/S with the OBGYN in the morning. She said if I felt like I couldn't relax, I could go to the ER, but that they may or may not have the means to do much. I decided I couldn't wait, and as soon as David got home, we immediately drove to the ER.
When I was waiting to be triaged, I realized I had left some notes (my medication information) at home, so David kindly went back home to retrieve them (as well as my injection). I had just been triaged when he returned. My coworker was so kind and came to see me while I was waiting. I was not expecting to see her, and immediately burst into tears when she gave me a hug. It meant so much to me to know that she cared about me and my well-being. Not long after, I was called back to a hospital bed where the nurse took down my information, took my vitals, and inserted an IV catheter into my arm to draw blood. Awhile later, the doctor came in and spoke to me. By this time, it was nearly 10pm. He ordered an ultrasound. The U/S technician wheeled me away and first did an abdominal U/S and then a transvaginal U/S. It was killing me because I couldn't see the screen, and she didn't say what she saw or what she was taking measurements of. When I got back to the hospital bed, I was so tired, and got a little bit of sleep. A little bit after midnight, the doctor came back in and told me that the cause of my bleed was from a small subchorionic hematoma (SCH), which was one of the better things I could have hoped for. He said that they were able to see the fetal pole and a yolk sac, but no heartbeat, which was ok, since it was still early. He said I was measuring at exactly 5 weeks, 6 days gestation (2 days more than I was expecting). I was just so glad to hear that I hadn't miscarried, and that the baby was developing as expected. My first U/S was not scheduled until 12/8/16, so it was great news to hear this. My HCG had also increased to 9,177 which was more good news. While the SCH was (and is) scary to me, I know it's something that happens more often with IVF patients, and I know that it is something that can often times resolve on its own. However, a SCH could possibly cause the placenta to separate from the uterine wall, and may be linked to an elevated risk of miscarriage and pre-term labor...so I was advised to be cautiously optimistic. The doctor told me to take it easy for the next few days and try to get into the OBGYN for another U/S. We were at the ER for 6+ hours that night!
After speaking to the OBGYN office the next day, we decided to keep my U/S appointment scheduled for 12/8/16. I took the day off and rested the entire weekend. On Monday, I went back to work (cautiously) and made a point to sit down, take the elevator, and rest as much as I could. Thankfully, this week was Reading Week (and next week is Finals), so my schedule has allowed for me to take it pretty easy.
I was immediately flooded with an overwhelming amount of emotions and started crying. I wasn't even expecting to see the heartbeat flicker, and here it was beating away at 132 beats per minute, right in the expected range! She showed us the womb, the fetal pole, and the yolk sac. It was an amazing site and I'm still on cloud nine thinking about it!
Our next U/S is scheduled for Monday, 12/19/16. I will be finished with the semester by then, and if it's good news, hopefully my doctor will release me into the care of my OBGYN! I have my first prenatal appointment scheduled for 12/28/16. David and I told his family the good news today (Sunday, 12/11/16). It was bittersweet, as we were planning to drive up to Coeur d'Alene, ID this year to celebrate Christmas in a beautiful rented lake house. However, with it being so early in the pregnancy, and now with the higher risks attributed to the SCH, it is best for us to stay in town should anything go wrong. We were bummed to break the news that we couldn't join them for Christmas after all, but we were also so excited to share the news that we're pregnant!
When I was waiting to be triaged, I realized I had left some notes (my medication information) at home, so David kindly went back home to retrieve them (as well as my injection). I had just been triaged when he returned. My coworker was so kind and came to see me while I was waiting. I was not expecting to see her, and immediately burst into tears when she gave me a hug. It meant so much to me to know that she cared about me and my well-being. Not long after, I was called back to a hospital bed where the nurse took down my information, took my vitals, and inserted an IV catheter into my arm to draw blood. Awhile later, the doctor came in and spoke to me. By this time, it was nearly 10pm. He ordered an ultrasound. The U/S technician wheeled me away and first did an abdominal U/S and then a transvaginal U/S. It was killing me because I couldn't see the screen, and she didn't say what she saw or what she was taking measurements of. When I got back to the hospital bed, I was so tired, and got a little bit of sleep. A little bit after midnight, the doctor came back in and told me that the cause of my bleed was from a small subchorionic hematoma (SCH), which was one of the better things I could have hoped for. He said that they were able to see the fetal pole and a yolk sac, but no heartbeat, which was ok, since it was still early. He said I was measuring at exactly 5 weeks, 6 days gestation (2 days more than I was expecting). I was just so glad to hear that I hadn't miscarried, and that the baby was developing as expected. My first U/S was not scheduled until 12/8/16, so it was great news to hear this. My HCG had also increased to 9,177 which was more good news. While the SCH was (and is) scary to me, I know it's something that happens more often with IVF patients, and I know that it is something that can often times resolve on its own. However, a SCH could possibly cause the placenta to separate from the uterine wall, and may be linked to an elevated risk of miscarriage and pre-term labor...so I was advised to be cautiously optimistic. The doctor told me to take it easy for the next few days and try to get into the OBGYN for another U/S. We were at the ER for 6+ hours that night!
After speaking to the OBGYN office the next day, we decided to keep my U/S appointment scheduled for 12/8/16. I took the day off and rested the entire weekend. On Monday, I went back to work (cautiously) and made a point to sit down, take the elevator, and rest as much as I could. Thankfully, this week was Reading Week (and next week is Finals), so my schedule has allowed for me to take it pretty easy.
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| U/S from 12/8/16: Fetal pole, yolk sac, & heartbeat (132 bpm) seen, small SCH superior to (above) fetus; measuring at 6 weeks, 5 days; CRL: 7.6 mm, Yolk Sac: 2.1 mm; SCH: 1.3 x 0.4 x 1.2 CM |
Yesterday (12/8/16), the entire day dragged as I waited for my U/S appointment at 2:40pm. When it was finally time, David met me in the waiting room. We were then led back to the U/S technician's office where I gave her a brief history of our IVF story as well as the ER visit. I was so nervous when she started the U/S. What if there's no heartbeat? What if the baby stopped developing? What if there's no baby and just an empty sac? What if the SCH has gotten bigger? What if I've miscarried? Every possible thought ran through my head. I got nervous when David stood up to look at the screen, and suddenly, the tech turned it to show us, and she said "There's the heartbeat."
I was immediately flooded with an overwhelming amount of emotions and started crying. I wasn't even expecting to see the heartbeat flicker, and here it was beating away at 132 beats per minute, right in the expected range! She showed us the womb, the fetal pole, and the yolk sac. It was an amazing site and I'm still on cloud nine thinking about it!
Our next U/S is scheduled for Monday, 12/19/16. I will be finished with the semester by then, and if it's good news, hopefully my doctor will release me into the care of my OBGYN! I have my first prenatal appointment scheduled for 12/28/16. David and I told his family the good news today (Sunday, 12/11/16). It was bittersweet, as we were planning to drive up to Coeur d'Alene, ID this year to celebrate Christmas in a beautiful rented lake house. However, with it being so early in the pregnancy, and now with the higher risks attributed to the SCH, it is best for us to stay in town should anything go wrong. We were bummed to break the news that we couldn't join them for Christmas after all, but we were also so excited to share the news that we're pregnant!
Update - Part 1
It has been a month since my transfer and boy, has it been a whirlwind!
My transfer (on Thursday, 11/10/16) went well. I went to my acupuncture appointment beforehand, suffered through the discomfort of a full bladder during the transfer, went to my follow up acupuncture appointment, and then went home and rested. While I took things pretty easy last time, I was even more "lazy" this time around and stayed in bed (or lied on the couch) for essentially the entire time I was at home (Thursday-Monday). I even switched my flight to a day later to give myself an extra day. I ate pineapple core, walnuts and Brazil nuts, drank pomegranate juice, and kept my feet warm. I was extra careful to sleep on my back only, and then eventually started sleeping on my sides as well.
On Tuesday, 11/15/16, I flew back home. David met me at the airport, and as soon as we got my luggage, we hopped in the car and stopped in a random parking lot so he could give me my Progesterone injection. The next day, I went back to work. I had 2 days of work that week, and thankfully, only 1 the next (since it was the week of Thanksgiving). I tried to use automatic doors and take the elevator as much as I possibly could. We spent Thanksgiving with friends, but other than that, I laid low and tried to use as little energy/strength as possible.
I had every intention of not doing a HPT, but on the evening of Friday, 11/18/16 (8dp5dt), David (forgot) and playfully smacked me on my butt, which immediately made me start freaking out. I gave in to my anxieties and took a cheap dollar store test, fully expecting it to be negative...except a faint second line finally appeared after the full 5 minute wait! At first, I thought it was a phantom line, and I read and re-read the instructions. After the wait time, it was clear that while light, there was definitely a second line! I called him into the bathroom and asked him what he saw. I think his reply was something like, "I'm going to be very cautious before believing anything." All the anxieties, fear, and worry, immediately rushed away. I could not believe it!
The next day, and the next day, and the next day, I took several more dollar store tests. I checked to see if the second line was still there and if it was getting darker. I even splurged and got a First Response Early Result test, and the second line was darker than the control line.
What was so weird was that during my 2ww, I did not have many symptoms at all, if any. The first transfer, I had headaches, cramping, heartburn, nausea...this time around, I had a couple headaches that I attributed to the injections...but a few days before taking the HPT, I remember sleeping with my hands on my abdomen, and I felt pregnant. Of course, I dismissed the idea, since I didn't know what it felt like to be pregnant.
Finding out I was pregnant was the most amazing feeling in the world, but it sucked because the only person I could share it with was David. We didn't want to share it with anyone else until I had passed all my beta tests and possibly even heard the heartbeat. My first beta was scheduled for the day before Thanksgiving, so we thought it would be perfect to tell my parents (who were visiting my brother) on Thanksgiving day. I was so nervous on the day of the beta (11/23/16), but was so excited when my nurse called me. She said, "Congratulations. You're pregnant!" and told me that my HCG level was at 665.7, which was higher than I had expected. My second beta was scheduled for the day after Thanksgiving, 11/25/16, and the number rose to 1,690. The third was that following Monday, 11/28/16, and it was 6,013!
I thought that getting a positive on a HPT would make everything super easy from there on out, but I was so wrong. With IVF, you are faced with so many hurdles during the entire process, and no sooner do you make it over one, that you are faced with ten more. The doctor wants to see your betas rise (preferably by 65%) with each test. After that, you are scheduled for ultrasounds at 6-7 weeks and then again at 8-9 weeks. He expects to see major milestones in development such as a fetal pole and yolk sac, and a heartbeat, before he is comfortable enough to release you into the care of your OBGYN. After each of these tests, I would be relieved to receive good results, but then start worrying about what would happen next.
To be continued...
My transfer (on Thursday, 11/10/16) went well. I went to my acupuncture appointment beforehand, suffered through the discomfort of a full bladder during the transfer, went to my follow up acupuncture appointment, and then went home and rested. While I took things pretty easy last time, I was even more "lazy" this time around and stayed in bed (or lied on the couch) for essentially the entire time I was at home (Thursday-Monday). I even switched my flight to a day later to give myself an extra day. I ate pineapple core, walnuts and Brazil nuts, drank pomegranate juice, and kept my feet warm. I was extra careful to sleep on my back only, and then eventually started sleeping on my sides as well.
 |
| Embryo (5 days) |
On Tuesday, 11/15/16, I flew back home. David met me at the airport, and as soon as we got my luggage, we hopped in the car and stopped in a random parking lot so he could give me my Progesterone injection. The next day, I went back to work. I had 2 days of work that week, and thankfully, only 1 the next (since it was the week of Thanksgiving). I tried to use automatic doors and take the elevator as much as I possibly could. We spent Thanksgiving with friends, but other than that, I laid low and tried to use as little energy/strength as possible.
I had every intention of not doing a HPT, but on the evening of Friday, 11/18/16 (8dp5dt), David (forgot) and playfully smacked me on my butt, which immediately made me start freaking out. I gave in to my anxieties and took a cheap dollar store test, fully expecting it to be negative...except a faint second line finally appeared after the full 5 minute wait! At first, I thought it was a phantom line, and I read and re-read the instructions. After the wait time, it was clear that while light, there was definitely a second line! I called him into the bathroom and asked him what he saw. I think his reply was something like, "I'm going to be very cautious before believing anything." All the anxieties, fear, and worry, immediately rushed away. I could not believe it!
The next day, and the next day, and the next day, I took several more dollar store tests. I checked to see if the second line was still there and if it was getting darker. I even splurged and got a First Response Early Result test, and the second line was darker than the control line.
What was so weird was that during my 2ww, I did not have many symptoms at all, if any. The first transfer, I had headaches, cramping, heartburn, nausea...this time around, I had a couple headaches that I attributed to the injections...but a few days before taking the HPT, I remember sleeping with my hands on my abdomen, and I felt pregnant. Of course, I dismissed the idea, since I didn't know what it felt like to be pregnant.
Finding out I was pregnant was the most amazing feeling in the world, but it sucked because the only person I could share it with was David. We didn't want to share it with anyone else until I had passed all my beta tests and possibly even heard the heartbeat. My first beta was scheduled for the day before Thanksgiving, so we thought it would be perfect to tell my parents (who were visiting my brother) on Thanksgiving day. I was so nervous on the day of the beta (11/23/16), but was so excited when my nurse called me. She said, "Congratulations. You're pregnant!" and told me that my HCG level was at 665.7, which was higher than I had expected. My second beta was scheduled for the day after Thanksgiving, 11/25/16, and the number rose to 1,690. The third was that following Monday, 11/28/16, and it was 6,013!
I thought that getting a positive on a HPT would make everything super easy from there on out, but I was so wrong. With IVF, you are faced with so many hurdles during the entire process, and no sooner do you make it over one, that you are faced with ten more. The doctor wants to see your betas rise (preferably by 65%) with each test. After that, you are scheduled for ultrasounds at 6-7 weeks and then again at 8-9 weeks. He expects to see major milestones in development such as a fetal pole and yolk sac, and a heartbeat, before he is comfortable enough to release you into the care of your OBGYN. After each of these tests, I would be relieved to receive good results, but then start worrying about what would happen next.
To be continued...
Tuesday, November 8, 2016
FET Schedule
I just got a voicemail from my nurse. My FET is scheduled for 2:00pm, but I need to check in at 1:30pm. 75 minutes prior to the FET, I need to empty my bladder and then drink 20 oz. of water (from 12:45pm-1:00pm). I am not looking forward to the full bladder part--that was absolutely awful last time!
My pre-FET acupuncture appointment is scheduled for 12:00pm (45-minute appt.). Then I will drink my water and check in for my FET appt. After the procedure, I will go back and do my post-FET acupuncture appointment, then go home and rest.
I will take it easy for 2-3 days (no lifting anything over 25 lb.), and continue my oral/vaginal Estrace and Progesterone injections until my first blood pregnancy test (scheduled for Wednesday, 11/23/16).
I am a little less nervous/anxious this time around, but of course I'm sure that will change as I enter the 2WW!
My pre-FET acupuncture appointment is scheduled for 12:00pm (45-minute appt.). Then I will drink my water and check in for my FET appt. After the procedure, I will go back and do my post-FET acupuncture appointment, then go home and rest.
I will take it easy for 2-3 days (no lifting anything over 25 lb.), and continue my oral/vaginal Estrace and Progesterone injections until my first blood pregnancy test (scheduled for Wednesday, 11/23/16).
I am a little less nervous/anxious this time around, but of course I'm sure that will change as I enter the 2WW!
FET Schedule for Thursday, 11/10/16:
- 12:00pm – 1st Acupuncture Appt.
- 12:45pm – Empty bladder, then drink 20 oz. of water before 1:00pm
- 1:30pm – Check in (4th floor) for FET Appt. (Bring photo ID)
- 2:00pm – FET procedure
- ~2:450pm – 2nd Acupuncture Appt. (exact time TBD)
After Transfer:
- Take it easy for 2-3 days; no heavy lifting
- Continue medications until first blood pregnancy test
